As of this morning: Three weeks on Instagram and I have learned some really interesting things. First of all, the DUH! stuff: You see what you want to, not what FB decides you should see. If you are friends with someone, you see their posts, period. Secondly, no one tells fart-jokes on your wine-threads, makes political statements on your car-threads, or takes racial or religious assumptions from your social-observation posts. But now to the really interesting things which have become clear the past couple weeks.
1. Everyone east of the Sierra-Nevadas still drink a RIDICULOUS amount of French and Italian wine. Seriously. We forget here in Cali. Vouvrays, Chablis, Sancerres, Chiantis and all kinds of Tuscans and BDX. Even Burgundy! Loads and LOADS of it. Even an occasional Rioja! Kinda jealous… kinda not. Wish I could rattle off European wines like most of them can.
2. People drink A LOT of white wine. Seriously? Maybe 1/50th of my cellar is white and half of that is absolute junk someone GAVE me or something. But on IG, constant whites. The afor-mentioned Vouvrays, Sancerres, Chablis, Sauv-blanc–not much Chard, actually–and Champagne. I can’t even remember the last time I drank a white.
3. Or maybe 2b… German wines still have the following they deserve. There are a BUNCH of really serious Riesling and Gewurtzraminer drinkers and collectors. It has just faded off my radar for the decade I have spent in this wine-wasteland called The Central Coast.
4. On that subject WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH ROSÉ?!?!? Holy crap rosé is everywhere, all the time, everyone makes one, or two, it is SERIOUSLY the latest trend. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE rosé–and have for years–it just seems weird to see it running on such faddish proportions. There are articles for merchants on how to market it–not really “How To Build An End-Cap” sorta marketing stuff, more like “What Wines To Get Off Your Shelves To Make More Room For Rosé” kinda articles. Rosé is epic.
5. Some fairly serious wine people still drink some REALLY BAD WINE. Seriously, folks. Time to step up your game a bit. Don’t post pictures of your Fetzer Chardonnay next to an ’02 CdP and gush “ON THE TABLE TONIGHT! CAN’T WAIT!!!” And when you have a full line-up of decent cabs going, feel free to yank out that bottle of Menage A’ Trois before you snap the pic, kthnxbai
6. What is the Gamay thing? Have I lived in a cave for 20 years? Every fourth wine post it seems is a bottle of Morgon. I really need to educate myself.
7. People still seem to have *decanting* backwards. I have always blamed this on the Easterners and their old-school European cellar habits, but here we are, 2014, and people are still decanting 20yo wines and pouring 2011 Caymus SS straight outa the bottle! Blows my mind.
8. Everyone is a somm. No, read that again. EVERYONE is a somm. Either a somm or in somm-school or taking a somm-test or somming for the summer or somm this and somm that everyone is a somm.
9. I don’t even know where you get the thumbs up emoticon or the wine-glass smilie or all the stupid little yellow faces I keep trying to tell the difference between the winking one and the surprised one and the sad one–wait, nevermind, no one is ever sad on Instagram–just stop putting them in long rows after your comments, OK? The cheeriness is positively annoying.
10. Self-promotion is not just casually accepted, but DE RIGUEUR. You know how the word ‘narcisisstic’ gets trotted out on #FB @facebook occasionally? Haha @Instagram #laughs at #you #winedork #wine #redwine #morgon#chablis #f4f @_soif #soif +soif Soif